Motherhood Part I

I have decided to chronicle the very surface of my married life, for those of you have seen it, and for those of you who we have just met, or barely know :)  Mostly, I am chronicling my mother hood journey :)   When we first got pregnant, I knew very few people around me going through similar events... actually, I take that back.  I knew no one experiencing what I was experiencing... just those getting pregnant right and left with very few problems.  However, I am now finding that more people are experiencing or did experience very similar things.  So, I am hoping, that by sharing my adventure, it would help others who may just be starting their trip, or who may be smack dab in the middle of it!

I know I have some friends who are yet to be married (or Mama's), but, in the interest of time, I'll skip that little story for another day.  Here is me, right about the same time I met J and probably about a year before we got married.  Yes, I know, I was cute ;)

Me, 1999

As young newlyweds, I thought the thing you were supposed to do was a wait a little while before having kids.  So, responsibly (because I didn't know about things like natural family planning), I began birth control pills.  We married in November, J deployed in April for 7 months and returned home the following November.  By the next summer, we decided to start on the family journey.  I stopped my pills, and for some reason "Aunt Flo" (just in case I have male readers, I won't go into any details, girls, you'll know who I mean) never showed up.  This got me quickly into a fertility specialist, who's only goal if life was to help me get pregnant!  

Tests were inconclusive, everything, they said, should be working.  We started our first round of treatments using clomid,  an oral medication that was supposed to help my eggs grow into mature, baby making ladies.  For several months we worked on adjusting the medication, which, fyi, is harrowing on the emotional system.  Then finally, we got one month that worked (but no pregnancy)... and then, the following month, we were pregnant!!!

J and I, Christmas, 2003

We told everyone our exciting news right away!  My doctor had me come in on a Saturday during week 5 and I saw our little blob (J was at work that day).  We had a follow up 7 week appointment and then a 9 week appointment.  And then a 14 week appointment (it took a while to get through the military system and into an OB clinic instead of the fertility clinic).  The corpsman (military equivalent of a nurses aide) came in with her doppler machine and started hunting around for a little heartbeat.  No luck.  She didn't seem surprised, she said she sometimes had problems when the babies were small.  So, then they brought in the ultrasound and the doctor.  He found the baby, but did not find a heart beat.  Little Bit had made it to 9 1/2 weeks, but no further. 

We were devastated.  For some reason the idea of a miscarriage had never crossed my mind.  Add to that, I had no idea that you could have a miscarriage without actually bleeding or something.  I'd felt sick right up to 12 weeks, my pants didn't fit, I was ready to move into lose pants, we'd bought a few, gender neutral onsies.  I cried, a lot, and was scheduled for surgery 2 days later (J had duty the very next day or they would have done it then).  

After that, we took a break, I didn't want to go through another loss.  But, eventually, we started up again with treatments (still no Aunt Flo).  This time, we were sent to a civilian doctor.  She insisted we do a procedure called an IUI.  In very simple words, J puts his "donation" in a cup, they clean it up, and insert them into me at the perfect moment.  All this after I did 2 months of birth control (to "clean things out").  We had one failed attempt and then, we were pregnant!!!

Our very first check up was at 6 1/2 weeks or so.  It was so nice to see a little tiny, flickery heart beat.  By now, I had left the Navy and was working at a hospital.  We decided to keep our news quiet this time.  That was hard, I was more nauseous and I remember sneaking crackers at my desk, just to keep me from having a constant sour face :)  Around 12 weeks, I had my first appointment with the OB office.  I really don't remember the visit, at all, I don't even know if J was there or not (although, I'm pretty sure he was).  I remember the doctor, she'd done my first surgery and follow up appointments.  She was just doing OB rounds, on loan from the fertility clinic.  I remember going back to work and one of the resident doctors looking at my, most likely red and swollen face, and telling me things would be okay (though he had no clue what had happend).  I remember telling my boss I was having surgery in a few days.  We were offered the option to wait, but we were headed to Alaska for my sisters wedding, so surgery was the safest way to go with travel plans in the future.  I remember waking up from surgery crying for my baby.  I remember we went to McDonald's afterwards because J was starving.  I remember we then called home to tell them we'd had another loss.

In Anchorage for the wedding

Dry your eyes- the story gets better here!!!  We immediately went back to treatments.  I don't remember who my doctor was.  I do remember that we did not have an IUI, just "strategically timed intercourse" ;)  I wasn't sure if things were going to work; but I got dizzy in the Wal-Mart one day, and hoped.  And then, my pregnancy test was positive.  Just after my 7 week mark, I woke up in the middle night with these searing pains in my groin.  I woke J and we headed to the ER.  I was convinced that I had an ectopic pregnancy.  But, when they did an ultrasound, there was a heartbeat, in the right spot!  It turned out I was popping ovary cysts right and left (due to the meds I had been taking).  It was a rough couple weeks after that, but it helped me through my all-day nauseousness.

This time, I got assigned to a civilian OB doctor.  He was Korean, didn't speak very good English and was "old school", but at 14 weeks, he confirmed we still had a baby and I loved him for it! 

Me (and my Mama) at my honorary sister's wedding

I quit my job at the end of March, attended a wedding in Illinois, and then waited for TW to show up.  It took that kid forever.  My doctor (warning, he was old school) scheduled my induction for the day after TW's due date.  I didn't want this.  I walked and walked and walked, every where.  Come out kid!  I had braxton hicks starting at 18 weeks, so I knew my body knew what to do.  The contractions came daily from 36 weeks on, so I was hopeful he'd be early.  Nothing.  I was going to school full time and dreaded going to class each day (it was the end of the semester anyway) because I knew someone would ask me why I was there.  I dreaded going to church and being asked the same thing.  Some how, I made it to the day before his due date.  And, when I woke up that morning, I felt different!  By the time J got home from work, I was hoping that the weird feeling would keep me from being induced.  Our good friends came over around 7 with a welcome baby basket, and I was then having contractions.  I called my mom around 8 and had a short conversation with her saying I'd call the next day.  We went to bed.   I woke J around 11:30, it took us 30 minutes to get downstairs and another 30 minutes to get to the hospital (we ran one red light) :)  And, at 1:05, I became a Mama.  My 7 pound 1 oz bundle of non-stop energy entered the world, one hour late, on May 3, 2006.  Happy Birthday "Little Man"!!!

Only a few hours old

Visiting home, just before he turned 2

On Grandpa's motorcycle

Iowa State Fair

Hanging Out

Trains!!!

And, of course, there is more story then this, because, if you know me at all, you know I have more than one bundle of joy!  But, that too will have to wait until another day.  For now, I'm going to go put in a Thomas show, TW requested it, and tomorrow, after all, is his birthday :)